Frozen That Sh*t

I had a mission when I came to Korea 4 1/2 years ago: learn how to put myself first and stop letting other people get in the way of my true happiness. I was pretty close when I arrived, I just needed that one last push; but then I made the mistake I had always made before. I got involved with a guy. Without getting into specifics, he was needy and I was sick so we mistook our resentment as love. Like a dog chasing it’s own tail, we tried to take care of each other when the best thing we could’ve done was to take care of ourselves. No one but he and I (and maybe my therapist)  truly understand the entire struggle of our relationship. All of it’s intricacies and inner-workings like a tangled web of cables under your desk.

Still and yet, now that I’ve found true happiness with myself and another man- there are still people who care to think that their negative, unfounded opinion has a place on top of this temple I worked tirelessly to build. As I said, no one will understand what me and my ex really went through except us. None of them truly knows how much personal growth I have achieved since the breakup. It’s absolutely none of their business and I owe them nothing at all in return for their weak words they sling around on social media.

There’s only two ways to respond to people that want to tear you down: you let them or you don’t. Now I knew when I announced my engagement on Facebook there would be a few people who rolled their eyes because they look at a situation and think they understand it based on limited information. What I wasn’t expecting were words meant to serve like daggers to my heart coming from people who seem to be acting on behalf of my ex. And if they weren’t acting on his behalf but rather took it upon themselves to write those words anyway, well then they really need to reassess their lives and what better things they could be doing with their time. They may also want to revisit how it makes them look to comment in such a fashion on a thread with over 200 ‘likes’ and 50+ other positive comments. Oh, that’s right- like a couple of trolls. [insert slow clap here]tumblr_myvakpjbtm1r1juc1o1_1280

The old me might have cared about their opinions and the hurt they put into their carelessly selected words. It might have affected me back when I required validation and wanted positive affirmation from those around me rather than myself. But now, I can simply disregard their lame attempts at breaking down my temple and eliminate them from my life with no fear of losing anything of value. Instead gaining strength and opening up myself to new opportunities, new growth. I can just- let it go.


3 thoughts on “Frozen That Sh*t

  1. its always at your happiest when idiotic miserable people feel the need to tear you down. They get into your business because either their sorry life isnt as fascinating or they have the narcissistic self somehow has the right to judge someone else. it also shows your ex has poor taste in friends. Id be ashamed of friends like that. You deserve all the happiness you work for and everyone else can just suck it. Congrats on getting engaged, Im hoping to embark on that journey too soon!=) i always meant to thank you for your recipes because they really helped me impress my soon-to-be new korean mother in law=p


  2. Ok so…a retract. I had thought that I came to follow your blog because of a recipe i was searching for but now realize it was your article on Padma and how awful she is. I loved it, it was torture watching her on tv. Either way, your blog helps me get through an otherwise long slow death of days. Now my days arent as torturous but i still enjoy reading your words. I wish youve had a better time this past year but i suppose we all go through this sad world with ups and downs so hang in there and know im cheering positive juju your way from across the world!=)


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